Extremity

Dear diary,

I had a fight with her today…go away, just let me live! Yeah that’s what I told her.

She was really hurt. I can see. She sobbed. Tried to convince me, grabbed my hand and held it tightly. She told me to think again and that we will discuss about it tomorrow. But I got myself free and just left.

I had to. It wasn’t easy, it had to look real. I had to try so hard to stop myself from making her calm by hugging her.

It couldn't have been done the easy way, if I told her the truth she would support me till the end. I didn’t want her to be a part of this mess. She was safe without me.

I cannot be weak now. I don’t know what I did was right but it has to be done.

I hope you understand.

Yours,

Andrew

It was already two hours since she came into the café with the intention of meeting him. She took a sip of water and stared at the door. It was dusk. She had told him to come. Getting annoyed, she stood and went out. Still no sign of him.

It started raining heavily. The smell of earth, the sound of rain, cars zooming, it was as if time stood still. There were people around but she felt alone.

She could give anything at that moment just to see him coming. But it seemed he wouldn’t come. She felt hollow. There was intense pain in the place where her heart was. As if somebody had stabbed her. An unusual crave which made her feel incomplete.

Still she stood there. Fully drenched.

She stayed for the sake of the smiles they shared. For the excitement when they did some mischief. For the adrenaline when they explored places together. For the unending conversations they had. For the triumphant feeling when she won a silly argument.

She stayed for the ecstatic feeling when he uttered those three magical words in the middle of a bridge. Then he had kissed her passionately. She stayed for that first kiss. And many other irresistible intense moments.

For the feeling of security she had when he held her hand while she cried. For the unsaid commitment which made them be with each other even after they faced problems.

She stayed for what she felt during these experiences. Because that’s what was left with her. His memory.

“Lisa!” somebody knocked the door, “Are you there? Let’s go.”

“Yeah”, she sighed and closed the diary.

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PS: This article originally appeared on the official online blog of SIES Graduate School of Technology, Scintilla Weekly on November 21st, 2013 [link].